This Blew Me Tha Fuck Away…From AskWhy
FS: But my commitment is to getting at truth – relationships be damned. I love people, but I love truth, honesty and clarity more. When people get to lyin’, I get to steppin’. By steppin’ – what I mean is, I lay folks out with truth.
AW: I’ve started to understand, for myself, that the one place that I personally have footing outside of the insanity is how I feel things related to truth, honesty and clarity. For me, the system loses any hope of my deep inner loyalty right at that spot, and since this system is based on hypocrisy/lies/illusions, that is a space with some wiggle room for me (the system still gets to me in terms of threat and fear of what it will do to me if I don’t play by its rules, but not on this other side).
So, what you say right here about truth, honesty, clarity — yes. I see and feel that that is the space you’re working in and that is the space that those white people arguing with you are disrespecting.
FS: I wasn’t desperately attached to the idea of ‘racism as a mental illness’ until this conversation. Now, I’m convinced. And my brother Asa’s assertion that “the MOST racist white person is the so-called liberal/progressive” was proven by this conversation.
AW: I never thought about it like that before but my experience is that this method of figuring out the situation does work in situations like this.
In my experience, there is a point where the truth is so disorienting/uncomfortable to people inside the space of white supremacy thinking/action that there is a reaction — and in my experience it’s not just any old critical reaction, it’s not like I would say “if you argue with me on anything you are just reacting.” No … there is an energy, tone quality (again that phrase), something that comes up as backlash to scary truth — an underlying desperation to hold on, to re-hide what is coming out through an exploration of the situation. It gets pretty frantic.
It uses various tactics but the purpose is the same: trying to re-hide what is emerging.
FS: If the primary tool that white people use to comprehend their environment (the brain), is compromised by racist termites, and white culture doesn’t encourage, support or allow one to use their other God given attributes (feelings, intuition) then folks are up shit’s creek.
AW: Seems to me that at least part of what people are arguing with you about is control and superiority. You saying stuff like this shows that you know that we white people are not the superior beings we claim to be in the cultural system.
You are decentering white people perceptions, using a way of finding truth that we don’t culturally have access to, and calling out a truth that threatens the core of the white self: we are not superior, we are not “in control” based on superiority. Why then are we in control in the arenas where we do have so much ugly power — control of land, of systems of decision-making etc? Illegitimate, the power is illegitimate. Wrong.
PS And it’s interesting to me that Sly Civilian is reacting to you, here and elsewhere, as if you are invoking the power of these white institutions he has been hurt by.
But it’s obvious you are coming from a very different space, as well as a very different location in the power structure/dynamic. He is speaking as if the truth-based threat you pose to white illusions is the same thing as institutionalized exercise of power-over inside the white cultural/structural system. But these are entirely different types of threat, one being positive and the other harmful.
His words/actions in the discussion are about regaining the white authority you are threatening by positioning himself as your victim — a position which, if accepted as accurate, carries some moral weight where you would need to listen to him, center on his perception of what is actually going on, and allow him to return to the white role of definer of what is going on.
And finally — thank you again. I feel like all this stuff that comes from centering in commitment to truth and clarity is so so valuable inside this horror. So so valuable for resistance and real change.
AskWhy, your words are the proof that beneath the denial and beneath – YES – the insanity, there beats a human heart, there lives a human being who can be reborn in authenticity, in humanity. Heavy is the head that wears the crown of “white superiority.” Take it off, and rejoin the human race muthafuckas!
As my good friend LA hints, much intellectual and spiritual rehab and deconstruction is required to assist our brothers and sisters of every hue. Including our own bleached out selves.
That’s what we’re here for ain’t it?